I spent some time this morning lying in bed watching CNN and was struck by trhe thought that politicians are really like admistrative drones crossed with PR guys. If you're primarily interested in staying in office for as long as possible you have to get pretty good at promotion and promotion is just making sure everyone knows who you are, first and foremost, and then hopefully make them like you as well. All the time you are practicing obscure and arcane manifestations of Robert's Rules of Order and related ceremonial pogroms.
If you watched this morning, would you have seen any elected person standing in front of a camera and telling the truth about anything? I sure didn't. And the people reporting the news are even worse in terms of being shallow apartchiks. I sometimes wonder if they even know what they're saying. Last week a Faux News bimbette prattled on about Sarah Palin while a shot of Tina Fey on SNL as the very same Queen of Nonsense was shown over her shoulder. She didn't flinch - certainly because she didn't notice - and jabbered on. Maybe nobody at Faux News noticed. These people almost universally look good but you just know that they are way more interested in how their hair looks for the most part. There are exceptions but with a 24 / 7 new cycle it's almost inevitable that some of what passes for news is just inconsequential gibberish.
I think the only people telling the truth in the media now are comedians - they're the only ones who can afford to and, more importantly, the only ones who want to. Not surprising when you think back to Lenny Bruce, George Carlin, and a long line of comedians who had license to poke fun at the politicos, kind of like the stuff that clowns can get away with doing. Was it Shakespear who said, "much truth is said in jest"? I guess that's our job.
I survived a trip to see my urologist last week - nice, uh...seeing you again, Bob. Jokes about urologists are just too easy so I will keep the comedy to a minimum but man, I am tempted. I currently have a client who is also a urologist and who knows the guy I just went to see. I mentioned that it was kind of a funny coincidence - my acquiring him as a client a week or so before my appointment - and he asked me to be sure to say Hi to Bob for him, chuckling to himself about Bob's sense of humor. I told him I would but I wanted to ask him if there was, like, a secret salute or double secret handshake that urologists use when they meet - maybe hand signs like gangs use, only limited to just a couple of fingers. At least this time he didn't have a resident with him observing like during my first visit. Nothing like being in the - let's just say undignified - position on the examining table and having TWO guys scrutinizing your plumbing and discussing it. The worst part was when the doc made some observation and then let his boy, Wang, get a, ahem, feel for himself what he was describing. Lucky for me he was an Asian dude and hand very small hands. I spent a couple of disquieting hours wondering if pictures were going to show up on the internet. I'm not really comfortable with the idea of a wacky urologist but I got a clean bill of health again this year so I have a year to try to think of something funny to say to him next December when I go back to see him. I'll just think of it like a special treat from Santa as I sit shifting uncomfortably in my seat in his waiting room.
Speaking of...well, showing off your junk to a virtual stranger in a weird, non-bedroom location, Representative Anthony Weiner admitted that he did indeed Tweet his pee-pee to various women he did not know for some reason, after telling everyone stridently and indignantly that he didn't. There is no truth to the rumor that there were injuries to numerous democrats as they stampeded in all directions trying to get away from him, giving lie to the stereotypical republican accusation that democrats are too liberal because they like to let it all hang out. In a stance that is difficult to understand, Mr. Weiner insists he won't resign, stating emphatically that the people of New York need him to stay in office and not resign, because doing so would mean leaving New York represented by a bunch of selfish, overly conservative dicks. He also insisted that, in spite of his flaunting of his penis over the internet, he really is a nice guy. Now he insists that he's just taking a "leave of absence" from the House to "get treatment". Man, I do not want to know what that means but him ever coming back from wherever he's going is about as likely as Ali Abdullah Saleh returning to Yemen in anything but a coffin. No please excuse me - I need to go pour over Palin's emails from when she was governor of Alaska. I'm sure it's full of insightful and thoughtful analysis of poltical philosophy and the ethical and moral imperitives that should guide our behaviour in a democracy...kinda like Aristotle but with a big fur coat and lipstick...
If you watched this morning, would you have seen any elected person standing in front of a camera and telling the truth about anything? I sure didn't. And the people reporting the news are even worse in terms of being shallow apartchiks. I sometimes wonder if they even know what they're saying. Last week a Faux News bimbette prattled on about Sarah Palin while a shot of Tina Fey on SNL as the very same Queen of Nonsense was shown over her shoulder. She didn't flinch - certainly because she didn't notice - and jabbered on. Maybe nobody at Faux News noticed. These people almost universally look good but you just know that they are way more interested in how their hair looks for the most part. There are exceptions but with a 24 / 7 new cycle it's almost inevitable that some of what passes for news is just inconsequential gibberish.
I think the only people telling the truth in the media now are comedians - they're the only ones who can afford to and, more importantly, the only ones who want to. Not surprising when you think back to Lenny Bruce, George Carlin, and a long line of comedians who had license to poke fun at the politicos, kind of like the stuff that clowns can get away with doing. Was it Shakespear who said, "much truth is said in jest"? I guess that's our job.
I survived a trip to see my urologist last week - nice, uh...seeing you again, Bob. Jokes about urologists are just too easy so I will keep the comedy to a minimum but man, I am tempted. I currently have a client who is also a urologist and who knows the guy I just went to see. I mentioned that it was kind of a funny coincidence - my acquiring him as a client a week or so before my appointment - and he asked me to be sure to say Hi to Bob for him, chuckling to himself about Bob's sense of humor. I told him I would but I wanted to ask him if there was, like, a secret salute or double secret handshake that urologists use when they meet - maybe hand signs like gangs use, only limited to just a couple of fingers. At least this time he didn't have a resident with him observing like during my first visit. Nothing like being in the - let's just say undignified - position on the examining table and having TWO guys scrutinizing your plumbing and discussing it. The worst part was when the doc made some observation and then let his boy, Wang, get a, ahem, feel for himself what he was describing. Lucky for me he was an Asian dude and hand very small hands. I spent a couple of disquieting hours wondering if pictures were going to show up on the internet. I'm not really comfortable with the idea of a wacky urologist but I got a clean bill of health again this year so I have a year to try to think of something funny to say to him next December when I go back to see him. I'll just think of it like a special treat from Santa as I sit shifting uncomfortably in my seat in his waiting room.
Speaking of...well, showing off your junk to a virtual stranger in a weird, non-bedroom location, Representative Anthony Weiner admitted that he did indeed Tweet his pee-pee to various women he did not know for some reason, after telling everyone stridently and indignantly that he didn't. There is no truth to the rumor that there were injuries to numerous democrats as they stampeded in all directions trying to get away from him, giving lie to the stereotypical republican accusation that democrats are too liberal because they like to let it all hang out. In a stance that is difficult to understand, Mr. Weiner insists he won't resign, stating emphatically that the people of New York need him to stay in office and not resign, because doing so would mean leaving New York represented by a bunch of selfish, overly conservative dicks. He also insisted that, in spite of his flaunting of his penis over the internet, he really is a nice guy. Now he insists that he's just taking a "leave of absence" from the House to "get treatment". Man, I do not want to know what that means but him ever coming back from wherever he's going is about as likely as Ali Abdullah Saleh returning to Yemen in anything but a coffin. No please excuse me - I need to go pour over Palin's emails from when she was governor of Alaska. I'm sure it's full of insightful and thoughtful analysis of poltical philosophy and the ethical and moral imperitives that should guide our behaviour in a democracy...kinda like Aristotle but with a big fur coat and lipstick...
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