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Sunday, January 29, 2012

John Boehner's empty threat meets Grover Norquist's blustery rhetoric...just another Sunday.

An increasingly desperate John Boner – on “This Week” this morning – called Obama’s State of the Union speech “unAmerican” and accused him of advocating the “politics of division”.  This phrase “politics of division” is another way of emphasizing one of his party’s main taking points, the idea of “class warfare”.  There’s great irony in the leader of the republicans in House of Representatives – the defenders of the ruling class, the wealthy and corporate America – sniveling about class warfare when their entire reason for being is to protect the wealth of those they feel earned it and deserve it and, more importantly, don’t give a shit about anyone else. 

This is the misguided notion at the heart of Elizabeth Warren’s speech – the one that went viral – where she points out that the wealthy didn’t create the wealth they possess by themselves.  They did it using the resources of the entire country and that, by definition, includes all of us.   Boner goes on to lay down an empty threat – that, “If the president won’t work with us to help create jobs, I’m sure the American people will elect someone who will.”  You better hope so, John, because if they don’t you will end up back as a simple member of the House from Ohio.  Or maybe you and John Kasich will end up in some tavern in Cleveland playing cribbage and swilling AleSmith Speedway Stout.   But the idea that you and your do-nothing cronies have lifted a finger to “create jobs” is laughable.  

Sure, you keep repeating the lie that the Keystone Pipeline will create 500 thousand jobs or some ridiculous number, and if the president doesn’t play along you’re gonna stomp your foot and stick the enabling legislation in every single bill that comes up this session until it passes.  Meanwhile progressives are pissed at Obama because he didn’t reject the filthy wasteful mess of a project out of hand.   This is nothing but the usual cloak room sleeve job for the oil companies who pay the freight for you and the rest of the treacherous swine you call colleagues.  

I’m sure your consultants tell you to keep pushing this one button because it’s a convenient symbol; you can cite environmental extremists – always a useful boogie man - and that allows you to justify environmental rape and plunder at the same time you bludgeon Obama regarding jobs.  It’s likely the same consultants who tell you to continually being up Solyndra as a symbol of the same misguided environmental extremism and throw in a little corruption while you’re at it.  But seriously; is this all you’ve got? 

 Face it Johnny – you’re scared shitless that no matter who the presidential candidate is, he’s going to get bitch slapped and sent home in disgrace and you and McConnell, Boy Wonder Eric Cantor, Tea Party pin up Paul Ryan and the rest of your unruly rabble will be looking at a very long second term indeed. 

People aren’t going to put up with the same absurd pre-school behavior for another four years.  They’re going to be pissed.  You and the entire republican machine are going to drown in your own effluent.  The alpha-dog Grover Norquists is going to be exposed as the closet treasonous and power-crazed fascist that he is.  He’s boldly talking now about how the president doesn’t matter and if Obama wins the presidency he’ll face republican majorities in both houses and if he doesn’t behave, Grover will put on his jack boots and lead an insurrection leading to an impeachment.  Good idea, Grover.  How’d that whole impeachment thing work out for Newt?  An emptier threat has rarely been uttered.  You dumb asses have completely over played your hand.  You’re not all wrong and Obama is not all right.  But the party has been so completely disingenuous, spiteful and childish that you’re done.  This primary season is proof of how empty your message is and the two leading candidates are the story writ large.   

You and Norquist both accuse Obama of not being willing to work with congress and pretty much everyone except mouth-breathing knuckle draggers know this isn’t true – not even close.  You’re on record since 2008 as saying that you will not cooperate with Obama on anything and are committed to his failure – do you really think you can get away with this ridiculous fiction that he’s the problem, not you?  Even Chevron executives know that’s not true.   

It’s approximately 48 hours before the results will be in in the Florida primary now and far too late for everyone to decide that Newt is an erratic ego-maniac not fit to be president of the local Moose Lodge and Romney is George HW Bush without the personality.   You can double down on the elaborate fairy tales of Paul Ryan with his “Let them eat cake” economic philosophy and have George Will semantically masturbating in a frenzy of obscure literary allusions and pseudo-intellectual gobble-dee-gook in the National Review till the cows come home.  At the end of the day your party – with the incredible opportunity in front of it to nominate someone who personifies the good parts of conservative political philosophy – gagged and coughed up these two chumps running around Florida in a drooling frenzy heaving rhetorical spitballs at each other and looking like the fools they are.  Couldn’t happen to a nicer guy, John.  So go home, have a drink and cry those phony crocodile tears Tuesday night.  And get ready for a long, long year.

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